Dylan Sprouse is already deep in dad mode—and his baby girl with Barbara Palvin hasn’t even arrived yet. He shows up to Not Skinny But Not Fat in glasses on a chain and New Balances, fully committed to the role.
In the episode, Sprouse roasts himself freely, talks about his wife with obvious adoration, and finds the joke even inside a genuinely frightening night at home. He also touches on parts of his childhood that unfolded away from the Disney Channel set. Fair warning, though: the conversation gets gloriously weird.
Below are the highlights from the conversation, adapted from the episode.
Why did you step away from acting to attend college?
“I made a very concerted effort that I did not want to act really at all during the college experience just because I also am too dumb to micromanage all of that at the same time. But you know, we were in class with other actors and actresses who were working, and I, I’m, I don’t even know if they still graduated…I was actually talking about on the way over here. I just think it’s my preferred medium of entertainment in general, just for me personally. And I, I still have a dream of, you know, maybe putting a nest egg aside and producing and making games. It hasn’t come to light.”
What really happened when you first met Barbara?
“I was up at the front of the line and, totally like a rom-com, she just jumps over the red velvet divider. And cuts me. And I was like, I don’t care how pretty you are, you’re not cutting me. And I was wearing a red and white stripe button down and she turns around…and I’m wearing this red and white striped shirt, and she goes, ‘What are you, a hot dog vendor?’ And I was just immediately in love…
…We ended up at the bar by happenstance after our little banter exchange, and, you know, we had some more bants. And then I told her, I was like, ‘Hey, you know, I’ve been here for 15 minutes, probably too long. I don’t know if you’re from out here, but wait for the door for me.’ Wait by the door as a joke. I said that. I was like, ‘Wait by the door, and I’ll come say goodbye.’ And she goes, ‘Yeah, I’ll be there.’ And then the next day, I messaged her. I said, ‘Hey, I know you said you’re from Hungary, but if you’re out in New York for a minute, I’d love to grab a beer or coffee with you, and maybe we can hang out and, you know, talk some more sh*t together.’ And she goes, ‘Hey, I’m still here by the door. Are you coming or not?’ And I was like, dude, I’m so in.”
Why is humor so important in your marriage?
“I really think humor is the key to a really positive long-term relationship, because if you can’t laugh at the same stuff, it’s like, I don’t even know what it would be like without it. Honestly, I don’t have the experience, cause I just need to be with someone who makes me laugh. I don’t think that I could manage it any other way.”
Do you still wake up wondering how you ended up with Barbara?
“Yes, of course I do. But at the same time, like, part of the joy for me is that it’s become so much more casual, right? Like in the beginning of dating anybody, you’re kind of like, ‘Oh my gosh,’ like ‘I can’t wait to show you my things and do this.’ But like, we’ve had that too, but Barbara and I’s shorthand with everything now is like we’re like an old married couple.”
How do you feel about becoming a dad to a baby girl?
“I’m extremely excited. It’s a girl; I think this is the first Sprouse girl born in a very long time. So, we have a very small family in general, but this is the first Sprouse girl in a very long time, which makes me nervous because I come from a family of just boys basically. So my dad can’t really help me understand this…I’m worried but excited too. I think practically, I think it’s obviously our first child; I think that’s like a load of work that you really can’t expect. What to do until you’re kind of there, like you can read only so much and you can like hearing anecdotes.”
Do you consider yourself Italian because you were born there?
“I do not call myself Italian. Nor do I think I’m Italian. I’m not pretending that I’m Italian…I have no nonna in Italian, in any of my Italian lineages…I’ll tell you what I am. I’m Californian. And I’m Californian because I think when you get brought up in a place, it affects the person that you are far more than your genetic lineage. I think like, dude, me going and hanging out with the El Camino Real kids in f**king Dickies and high socks in Woodland Hills, California, is way more essential to my identity than like my genetic background.”
Why did you and Cole begin acting so young?
“I mean, if you want to boil it down, it could definitely be that we started acting at that age, and you can hardly call it acting because it’s like drooling and farting…which I still do, but like now I’m a pro. Now I’ve been doing it for years and stuff, yeah, my mom and my dad were thinking about the divorce like we talked about, and then, I think she very intelligently saw that there was this industry that was happening in California, which at that point in time, like, again, no social, no self tapes, these weren’t really a thing…
…Nowadays they don’t require that much of you, and I think the actors are cast definitely more to be like who they are, and we as kids when we got into the industry, it was really a practical thing. Because kids can only work so many hours in child labor laws, but if you had the same baby, you could double your hours. So twins were hired a lot.”
What was happening at home when you started ‘The Suite Life’?
“From about 11 onward, my mom suffered from a lot of different things, but it was largely drug-induced…There was a big custody battle around the time that we were 11, which is conveniently when we were starting The Suite Life, which is crazy.”
Why did meeting David Lynch make you quit cigarettes?
“I was smoking cigarettes at the time, and I was like, ‘F**k, I need to go get a cigarette.’ And [Barbara’s] like, ‘I think you should just go up and say hi to [David Lynch].’ And I was like, ‘No, I really don’t want to. I’m just gonna go have a cigarette.’ So, I’m out there and I go to light up my cigarette. And like a minute later, David Lynch walks into the smoking section. And he goes, ‘Excuse me, young man, do you happen to have a cigarette?’ And I was like, yo, gave him a cigarette. He’s like, ‘Do you happen to have a light?’…He goes, ‘Thank you very much.’ He walks over to the corner of the smoking section, and he sits down, and he’s smoking it, and then about like a beat later, Laura Dern walks in and sits down across from him, and she goes, ‘Do you mind if I?’ and he goes, ‘Sure.’ And he pulls out of his pocket a fresh pack of cigarettes, hands her one. She’s like, ‘Can you light it for me?’ And he goes, ‘Yep,’ and he lights a cigarette for her. I was like, ‘What?’ And so they finished smoking, and I’m thinking about it the whole time. And then, you know, they get up. And David walks out, and he goes, ‘I just want to tell you, you’re very polite, thank you.’ And he walked out…
…It made me want to quit smoking, and I’ll tell you why. Because I’ll never have a better cigarette than that in my entire life. Because what he did—he gave me the most elegant understanding of how to approach someone that’s fangirling over you…I think he’s one of the smartest guys, and I think he noticed, and he knew. That’s why he had a fresh pack of cigarettes. He had a lighter. I was elated, and he gave me a story that is better than any picture, any autograph, anything. He gave me what I’m telling you now, and to this day.”
What actually happened during the home invasion—and did you tackle the man?
“Yeah, I’m on the couch and I’m lying down and I’m playing video games, which is crazy because like if you were to look through the window, like there’s definitely a lazy guy on the couch playing video games, so he just like was not aware of his surroundings, I think. Well, actually, I know. So, he goes to open the front door, and I was like, ‘What the f**k?’ It’s cause it’s midnight. And I’m like, ‘Who’s there?’ And he goes, ‘It’s me.’…He was tweaking…I was like, ‘Hey, come around the corner. I have a gun. Come out from where you are. Keep your hands where I can see them.’ When he walks around the corner, he’s got a cigarette and a longboard skateboard in his hand. And immediately I was like…this guy’s from Santa Monica, he’s high as f**k…I walked him out. I didn’t tackle the guy…She’s safe, even more so than me. I’m happy that my wife, my dog, and my cat are safe. That’s what really matters.”
To hear the full conversation, listen to Not Skinny but Not Fat wherever you get your podcasts.
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