Kimberly Van Der Beek shared an emotional Instagram tribute on the three-month anniversary of James’ death from colorectal cancer, writing, “I feel him.”

James Van Der Beek’s name is back in the spotlight of a deeply personal milestone as his widow, Kimberly Van Der Beek, marked the three-month anniversary of his death—writing on Instagram that she still “feels him.”

On Tuesday, Kimberly posted a memorial message reflecting on the moment her family lost @vanderjames.. She described the weeks after the news as a period when “comforts of shock” softened. only for the reality of his absence to settle in more fully.. “To say I’m heartbroken is a severe understatement. ” she wrote. adding that words cannot fully capture what grief feels like.

Kimberly also acknowledged the strange passage of time, noting that it felt almost unbelievable that three months have already passed. In her post, she stressed that although he is physically gone, the bond is still present in her day-to-day life, and the family continues to miss him.

Beyond the sorrow, she shared how her connection feels different now.. Kimberly wrote about what she called “a different kind of magic in the air. ” saying she can “feel him” and knows him “more deeply” than before.. She also described a deepening relationship with God. saying her “conscious connection” has grown. and that she believes “the veils of the universe have thinned.”

For Kimberly, faith is not a separate storyline from grief—it’s part of how she’s walking through the loss with her family. She framed it as a path her household was “always intended to walk,” suggesting this period of mourning has become intertwined with spiritual meaning.

In the same Instagram tribute, Kimberly extended thanks to the people who have reached out since James’ passing.. She wrote that the support has been “tremendous. ” and that it has helped hold her family in “the most beautiful of ways.” She also said fans went “absolutely above and beyond” what she could have expected. honoring James and supporting them through the hardest days.

Kimberly ended her post with a note that there is more she plans to share in time. Even as she focused on the anniversary, she signaled that her reflection—and the stories her family may still want to tell—won’t end here.

The tribute came alongside a carousel of family photos featuring James and their six children. offering a quiet visual reminder of their life together.. The way she combined personal grief. spiritual language. and public gratitude made the post feel both intimate and communal. as supporters around the world read her words as a message addressed not only to her husband. but to everyone holding the family in their thoughts.

It has now been three months since James Van Der Beek died of colorectal cancer. and Kimberly’s post reflects what many families experience after the initial shock fades: grief becoming more concrete. more present. and harder to contain.. Her insistence that she “feels him” points to the enduring nature of attachment. even when the day-to-day changes have already reshaped life.

In sharing that she knows him “more deeply” now, Kimberly also suggests that mourning can evolve.. For her. the anniversary isn’t just a marker of time lost—it’s part of an ongoing effort to preserve connection. lean on faith. and allow support from others to help her family move forward without letting James’ memory disappear.

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