move from – A Minnesota man planned to live in Korea forever—until parenthood and education costs pushed him to reconsider returning to the U.S.
When Derek Laan first arrived in Korea, he imagined staying forever. Then he started building a family—and the details of raising kids made the decision much more complicated.
Laan grew up in Minnesota with the kind of childhood memory that sticks: forests near his home. hikes and mountain biking. and the day he realized half the woods were being cleared for housing.. That early sense of “why can’t we just share the green spaces” followed him into adulthood in an unexpected way—through curiosity. and eventually. through travel.
At 19. after his first year of college. he worked at a YMCA summer camp and was assigned to a group of Korean kids.. A canoe trip. cooking over a fire. and the experience of being welcomed into a different rhythm of life helped change his trajectory.. The group leader invited him to guide trips in Korea. and within a year he was there—flying over a landscape of mountains and forests. but also seeing how quickly modern cities rise alongside them.. His first impression was simple and enthusiastic: he planned to love it.
After graduating, he moved to Korea to teach English, but he treated the job as a stepping stone at first.. He wanted to learn Korean and find a “cool” path. and he says he discovered he was unusually good at languages.. Once he became fluent, he shifted toward business work—using communication skills to help Korean companies work with international partners.. In 2013, he began at Doosan Group in Seoul and worked his way up.. Later he joined Descente, then moved through other roles before landing at Intralink.. Along the way. Korea stopped being just a place he lived and started becoming a place where he built a professional identity.
That professional life ran alongside a personal one.. He met his wife in 2018 and married in Korea the following year.. Their first son arrived in 2021, and he now has two children.. In day-to-day terms. parenthood means early mornings: feeding kids breakfast. dropping them at daycare. and getting to an office near Gwanghwamun Square. where the commute takes about an hour.. Work remains meeting-heavy—mapping opportunities and following up with potential clients. including travel across the country a couple times a week for in-person conversations.. By early evening. his priority becomes home: playground time. books. and—he says he tries hard for this—giving his wife a break. because “having two boys is really stressful.”
What he gave up is not the career glamour people often associate with moving abroad.. He describes a different kind of trade-off: in Korea. his visibility comes from being on television sometimes. riding his bike with sponsorship. and giving university lectures.. He says the same version of that life might not happen back in the U.S.—he would likely be “just some dude.” Yet the bigger cost was quieter: the slower promotions and the reality that salaries are generally lower.. When you factor in a family, money becomes a lever you can’t ignore.
The turning point, however, wasn’t only income.. It was education, and the math of what parenting would look like over time.. Laan said he had been determined to stay in Korea “forever” until last year. when he began thinking more seriously about his sons’ long-term prospects.. Once he started imagining them in school. he felt his certainty shift—especially as he considered how hard life might feel without the U.S.. school route he knew.
To understand why, it helps to understand how migration decisions tend to change with children.. A single adult can weigh experiences like culture, career experiments, and lifestyle novelty.. Parents have to think in years, not seasons: schooling, childcare, safety nets, and the cost of stability.. For Laan, that meant doing calculations around moving back to Colorado, where his parents and sister live in Boulder.. The lifestyle he has in Korea would require. in his estimate. about four times as much income to maintain it—one reason the move isn’t just emotional. it’s economic.
Still, there are practical advantages to staying.. He points to free daycare in Korea and support from a government program that provides a babysitter after daycare for about $10 per hour.. His plan, at least for now, is to remain until his oldest reaches first grade.. The reasoning is straightforward: if he sends his son to elementary school in the U.S.. he says the elementary level would be free. reducing daycare pressure for both kids.
His wife also pushed the conversation in a way that landed with him.. She told him to ask any Korean parent with a visa and the money for it whether they’d send their kids to the U.S.—she said most would say yes.. That isn’t a small comment in a household where future school options can determine what kind of childhood the kids get.. It also reflects a wider. human reality that isn’t captured by headlines: families often chase “best options. ” and those options usually look different once children can’t simply be uprooted on a whim.
Even his relationship with culture has to be re-evaluated through a parenting lens.. He once loved cycling and says it was a serious part of his youth. but he also notes that a “professional cycling” path isn’t as common in Korea.. More broadly. he describes a cultural emphasis on study so intense that it can crowd out other choices—an environment where even thinking about something outside school can feel discouraged.. For a parent imagining identity formation and extracurricular freedom, that becomes part of the decision, not just a footnote.
So what does the future look like?. He doesn’t frame it as Korea being “bad”—he clearly still loves it.. Instead, he describes the ache of leaving as something that matters precisely because his life there has been meaningful.. If he returns. he believes he can reshape his career around connections: working for the same type of business. helping U.S.. clients pursue opportunities in Asia, or partnering with Korean companies aiming at the U.S.. At the same time. Korea remains “awesome. ” and his current plan is to stay long enough to bridge the most expensive education transition.
In the end. his story is less about one man changing his mind and more about what parenthood does to immigration dreams.. You can plan to live abroad forever. but once kids enter the picture. the questions narrow to essentials: where will they learn. how will childcare work. and what sacrifices will the family accept without losing itself.. For Laan, Korea may remain the place where he built a life.. The U.S.. may still be the place where he decides his sons can thrive—at least when the next school chapter begins.